The Congress Man
Paid for by nobody in particular

The Congress
Man

Public Service - For A Price
On the floor today

My platform, in full

1

A chicken in every pot. A small recurring fee on every pot. Terms and conditions available never.

2

I promise full transparency. You will be able to watch me clearly, right up until the part that matters.

3

I will fight tirelessly for the little guy, from a great and very comfortable distance.

4

Term limits are for people who lack my discipline. I have been here a while. I intend to stay a while.

5

My pockets are not full. They are simply optimistic about the future, and the future keeps paying.